Life Of Johnson, Volume 4 (of 6) - Boswell
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In the evening I came to him again. He was somewhat fretful from his
illness. A gentleman[538] asked him, whether he had been abroad to-day.
'Don't talk so childishly, (said he.) You may as well ask if I hanged
myself to-day.' I mentioned politicks. JOHNSON. 'Sir, I'd as soon have a
man to break my bones as talk to me of publick affairs, internal or
external. I have lived to see things all as bad as they can be.'
Having mentioned his friend the second Lord Southwell, he said, 'Lord
Southwell was the highest-bred man without insolence that I ever was in
company with; the most _qualified_ I ever saw. Lord Orrery[539] was not
dignified: Lord Chesterfield was, but he was insolent[540]. Lord
----[541] is a man of coarse manners, but a man of abilities and
information. I don't say he is a man I would set at the head of a
nation, though perhaps he may be as good as the next Prime Minister that
comes; but he is a man to be at the head of a Club; I don't say _our_
CLUB; for there's no such Club.' BOSWELL. 'But, Sir, was he not once a
factious man?' JOHNSON. 'O yes, Sir; as factious a fellow as could be
found: one who was for sinking us all into the mob[542].' BOSWELL. 'How
then, Sir, did he get into favour with the King?' JOHNSON. 'Because,
Sir, I suppose he promised the King to do whatever the King pleased.'
He said, 'Goldsmith's blundering speech to Lord Shelburne, which has
been so often mentioned, and which he really did make to him, was only a
blunder in emphasis: "I wonder they should call your Lordship
_Malagrida_[543], for Malagrida was a very good man;" meant, I wonder
they should use _Malagrida_ as a term of reproach[544].'
Soon after this time I had an opportunity of seeing, by means of one of
his friends[545], a proof that his talents, as well as his obliging
service to authours, were ready as ever. He had revised _The Village_,
an admirable poem, by the Reverend Mr. Crabbe. Its sentiments as to the
false notions of rustick happiness and rustick virtue were quite
congenial with his own[546]; and he had taken the trouble not only to
suggest slight corrections and variations, but to furnish some lines,
when he thought he could give the writer's meaning better than in the
words of the manuscript[547].
On Sunday, March 30, I found him at home in the evening, and had the
pleasure to meet with Dr. Brocklesby[548], whose reading, and knowledge
of life, and good spirits, supply him with a never-failing source of
conversation. He mentioned a respectable gentleman, who became extremely
penurious near the close of his life. Johnson said there must have been
a degree of madness about him. 'Not at all, Sir, (said Dr. Brocklesby,)
his judgement was entire.' Unluckily, however, he mentioned that
although he had a fortune of twenty-seven thousand pounds, he denied
himself many comforts, from an apprehension that he could not afford
them. 'Nay, Sir, (cried Johnson,) when the judgement is so disturbed
that a man cannot count, that is pretty well.'
I shall here insert a few of Johnson's sayings, without the formality of
dates, as they have no reference to any particular time or place.
'The more a man extends and varies his acquaintance the better.' This,
however, was meant with a just restriction; for, he on another occasion
said to me, 'Sir, a man may be so much of every thing, that he is
nothing of any thing.'
'Raising the wages of day-labourers is wrong[549]; for it does not make
them live better, but only makes them idler, and idleness is a very bad
thing for human nature.'
'It is a very good custom to keep a journal[550] for a man's own use; he
may write upon a card a day all that is necessary to be written, after
he has had experience of life. At first there is a great deal to be
written, because there is a great deal of novelty; but when once a man
has settled his opinions, there is seldom much to be set down.'
'There is nothing wonderful in the journal which we see Swift kept in
London, for it contains slight topicks, and it might soon be
written[551].'
I praised the accuracy of an account-book of a lady whom I mentioned.
JOHNSON. 'Keeping accounts, Sir, is of no use when a man is spending his
own money, and has nobody to whom he is to account. You won't eat less
beef to-day, because you have written down what it cost yesterday.' I
mentioned another lady who thought as he did, so that her husband could
not get her to keep an account of the expence of the family, as she
thought it enough that she never exceeded the sum allowed her. JOHNSON.
'Sir, it is fit she should keep an account, because her husband wishes
it; but I do not see its use[552].' I maintained that keeping an account
has this advantage, that it satisfies a man that his money has not been
lost or stolen, which he might sometimes be apt to imagine, were there
no written state of his expence; and beside, a calculation of oeconomy
so as not to exceed one's income, cannot be made without a view of the
different articles in figures, that one may see how to retrench in some
particulars less necessary than others. This he did not attempt
to answer.
Talking of an acquaintance of ours[553], whose narratives, which
abounded in curious and interesting topicks, were unhappily found to be
very fabulous; I mentioned Lord Mansfield's having said to me, 'Suppose
we believe one _half_ of what he tells.' JOHNSON. 'Ay; but we don't know
_which_ half to believe. By his lying we lose not only our reverence for
him, but all comfort in his conversation.' BOSWELL. 'May we not take it
as amusing fiction?' JOHNSON. 'Sir, the misfortune is, that you will
insensibly believe as much of it as you incline to believe.'
It is remarkable, that notwithstanding their congeniality in politicks,
he never was acquainted with a late eminent noble judge[554], whom I
have heard speak of him as a writer, with great respect[555]. Johnson, I
know not upon what degree of investigation, entertained no exalted
opinion of his Lordship's intellectual character[556]. Talking of him to
me one day, he said, 'It is wonderful, Sir, with how little real
superiority of mind men can make an eminent figure in publick life.' He
expressed himself to the same purpose concerning another law-Lord, who,
it seems, once took a fancy to associate with the wits of London; but
with so little success, that Foote said, 'What can he mean by coming
among us? He is not only dull himself, but the cause of dullness in
others[557].' Trying him by the test of his colloquial powers, Johnson
had found him very defective. He once said to Sir Joshua Reynolds, 'This
man now has been ten years about town, and has made nothing of it;'
meaning as a companion[558]. He said to me, 'I never heard any thing
from him in company that was at all striking; and depend upon it, Sir,
it is when you come close to a man in conversation, that you discover
what his real abilities are; to make a speech in a publick assembly is a
knack. Now I honour Thurlow, Sir; Thurlow is a fine fellow; he fairly
puts his mind to yours[559].'
After repeating to him some of his pointed, lively sayings, I said, 'It
is a pity, Sir, you don't always remember your own good things, that you
may have a laugh when you will.' JOHNSON. 'Nay, Sir, it is better that I
forget them, that I may be reminded of them, and have a laugh on their
being brought to my recollection.'
When I recalled to him his having said as we sailed up Loch-lomond[560],
'That if he wore any thing fine, it should be _very_ fine;' I observed
that all his thoughts were upon a great scale. JOHNSON. 'Depend upon it,
Sir, every man will have as fine a thing as he can get; as a large
diamond for his ring.' BOSWELL. 'Pardon me, Sir: a man of a narrow mind
will not think of it, a slight trinket will satisfy him:
"_Nee sufferre queat majoris pondera gemmae_[561]."'
I told him I should send him some Essays which I had written[562], which
I hoped he would be so good as to read, and pick out the good ones.
JOHNSON. 'Nay, Sir, send me only the good ones; don't make _me_
pick them.'
I heard him once say, 'Though the proverb _Nullum numen abest, si sit
prudentia[563], does not always prove true, we may be certain of the
converse of it, _Nullum numen adest, si sit imprudentia_.'
Once, when Mr. Seward was going to Bath, and asked his commands, he
said, 'Tell Dr. Harrington that I wish he would publish another volume
of the _Nugae antiquae_[564]; it is a very pretty book[565].' Mr. Seward
seconded this wish, and recommended to Dr. Harrington to dedicate it to
Johnson, and take for his motto, what Catullus says to Cornelius Nepos:--
'----_namque tu solebas,
Meas esse aliquid putare_ NUGAS[566].'
As a small proof of his kindliness and delicacy of feeling, the
following circumstance may be mentioned: One evening when we were in the
street together, and I told him I was going to sup at Mr. Beauclerk's,
he said, 'I'll go with you.' After having walked part of the way,
seeming to recollect something, he suddenly stopped and said, 'I cannot
go,--but _I do not love Beauclerk the less_.'
On the frame of his portrait, Mr. Beauclerk had inscribed,--
'----_Ingenium ingens
Inculto latet hoc sub corpore_[567].'
After Mr. Beauclerk's death, when it became Mr. Langton's property, he
made the inscription be defaced. Johnson said complacently, 'It was kind
in you to take it off;' and then after a short pause, added, 'and not
unkind in him to put it on.'
He said, 'How few of his friends' houses would a man choose to be at
when he is sick.' He mentioned one or two. I recollect only
Thrale's[568].
He observed, 'There is a wicked inclination in most people to suppose an
old man decayed in his intellects. If a young or middle-aged man, when
leaving a company, does not recollect where he laid his hat, it is
nothing; but if the same inattention is discovered in an old man, people
will shrug up their shoulders, and say, 'His memory is going[569].'
When I once talked to him of some of the sayings which every body
repeats, but nobody knows where to find, such as _Quos DEUS vult
perdere, prius dementat_[570]; he told me that he was once offered ten
guineas to point out from whence _Semel insanivimus omnes_ was taken. He
could not do it; but many years afterwards met with it by chance in
_Johannes Baptista Mantuanus_[571].
I am very sorry that I did not take a note of an eloquent argument in
which he maintained that the situation of Prince of Wales was the
happiest of any person's in the kingdom, even beyond that of the
Sovereign. I recollect only--the enjoyment of hope[572],--the high
superiority of rank, without the anxious cares of government,--and a
great degree of power, both from natural influence wisely used, and from
the sanguine expectations of those who look forward to the chance of
future favour.
Sir Joshua Reynolds communicated to me the following particulars:--
Johnson thought the poems published as translations from Ossian had so
little merit, that he said, 'Sir, a man might write such stuff for ever,
if he would _abandon_ his mind to it[573].'
He said, 'A man should pass a part of his time with _the laughers_, by
which means any thing ridiculous or particular about him might be
presented to his view, and corrected.' I observed, he must have been a
bold laugher who would have ventured to tell Dr. Johnson of any of his
particularities[574].
Having observed the vain ostentatious importance of many people in
quoting the authority of Dukes and Lords, as having been in their
company, he said, he went to the other extreme, and did not mention his
authority when he should have done it, had it not been that of a Duke or
a Lord[575].
Dr. Goldsmith said once to Dr. Johnson, that he wished for some
additional members to the LITERARY CLUB, to give it an agreeable
variety; for (said he,) there can now be nothing new among us: we have
travelled over one another's minds. Johnson seemed a little angry, and
said, 'Sir, you have not travelled over _my_ mind, I promise you.' Sir
Joshua, however, thought Goldsmith right; observing, that 'when people
have lived a great deal together, they know what each of them will say
on every subject. A new understanding, therefore, is desirable; because
though it may only furnish the same sense upon a question which would
have been furnished by those with whom we are accustomed to live, yet
this sense will have a different colouring; and colouring is of much
effect in every thing else as well as in painting.'
Johnson used to say that he made it a constant rule to talk as well as
he could both as to sentiment and expression, by which means, what had
been originally effort became familiar and easy[576]. The consequence of
this, Sir Joshua observed, was, that his common conversation in all
companies was such as to secure him universal attention, as something
above the usual colloquial style was expected[577].
Yet, though Johnson had this habit in company, when another mode was
necessary, in order to investigate truth, he could descend to a language
intelligible to the meanest capacity. An instance of this was witnessed
by Sir Joshua Reynolds, when they were present at an examination of a
little blackguard boy, by Mr. Saunders Welch[578], the late Westminster
Justice. Welch, who imagined that he was exalting himself in Dr.
Johnson's eyes by using big words, spoke in a manner that was utterly
unintelligible to the boy; Dr. Johnson perceiving it, addressed himself
to the boy, and changed the pompous phraseology into colloquial
language. Sir Joshua Reynolds, who was much amused by this procedure,
which seemed a kind of reversing of what might have been expected from
the two men, took notice of it to Dr. Johnson, as they walked away by
themselves. Johnson said, that it was continually the case; and that he
was always obliged to _translate_ the Justice's swelling diction,
(smiling,) so as that his meaning might be understood by the vulgar,
from whom information was to be obtained[579].
Sir Joshua once observed to him, that he had talked above the capacity
of some people with whom they had been in company together. 'No matter,
Sir, (said Johnson); they consider it as a compliment to be talked to,
as if they were wiser than they are. So true is this, Sir, that Baxter
made it a rule in every sermon that he preached, to say something that
was above the capacity of his audience[580].'
Johnson's dexterity in retort, when he seemed to be driven to an
extremity by his adversary, was very remarkable. Of his power in this
respect, our common friend, Mr. Windham, of Norfolk, has been pleased to
furnish me with an eminent instance. However unfavourable to Scotland,
he uniformly gave liberal praise to George Buchanan[581], as a writer.
In a conversation concerning the literary merits of the two countries,
in which Buchanan was introduced, a Scotchman, imagining that on this
ground he should have an undoubted triumph over him, exclaimed, 'Ah, Dr.
Johnson, what would you have said of Buchanan, had he been an
Englishman?' 'Why, Sir, (said Johnson, after a little pause,) I should
_not_ have said of Buchanan, had he been an _Englishman_, what I will
now say of him as a _Scotchman_,--that he was the only man of genius
his country ever produced.'
And this brings to my recollection another instance of the same nature.
I once reminded him that when Dr. Adam Smith was expatiating on the
beauty of Glasgow, he had cut him short by saying, 'Pray, Sir, have you
ever seen Brentford?' and I took the liberty to add, 'My dear Sir,
surely that was _shocking_.' 'Why, then, Sir, (he replied,) YOU have
never seen Brentford.'
Though his usual phrase for conversation was _talk_[582], yet he made a
distinction; for when he once told me that he dined the day before at a
friend's house, with 'a very pretty company;' and I asked him if there
was good conversation, he answered, 'No, Sir; we had _talk_ enough, but
no _conversation_; there was nothing _discussed_.'
Talking of the success of the Scotch in London, he imputed it In a
considerable degree to their spirit of nationality. 'You know, Sir,
(said he,) that no Scotchman publishes a book, or has a play brought
upon the stage, but there are five hundred people ready to applaud
him.[583]'
He gave much praise to his friend, Dr. Burney's elegant and entertaining
travels[584], and told Mr. Seward that he had them in his eye, when
writing his _Journey to the Western Islands of Scotland_.
Such was his sensibility, and so much was he affected by pathetick
poetry, that, when he was reading Dr. Beattie's _Hermit_ in my presence,
it brought tears into his eyes[585].
He disapproved much of mingling real facts with fiction. On this
account he censured a book entitled _Love and Madness_[586].
Mr. Hoole told him, he was born in Moorfields, and had received part of
his early instruction in Grub-street. 'Sir, (said Johnson, smiling) you
have been _regularly_ educated.' Having asked who was his instructor,
and Mr. Hoole having answered, 'My uncle, Sir, who was a taylor;'
Johnson, recollecting himself, said, 'Sir, I knew him; we called him the
_metaphysical taylor_. He was of a club in Old-street, with me and
George Psalmanazar, and some others[587]: but pray, Sir, was he a good
taylor?' Mr. Hoole having answered that he believed he was too
mathematical, and used to draw squares and triangles on his shop-board,
so that he did not excel in the cut of a coat;--'I am sorry for it (said
Johnson,) for I would have every man to be master of his own business.'
In pleasant reference to himself and Mr. Hoole, as brother authours, he
often said, 'Let you and I, Sir, go together, and eat a beef-steak in
Grub-street[588].'
Sir William Chambers, that great Architect[589], whose works shew a
sublimity of genius, and who is esteemed by all who know him for his
social, hospitable, and generous qualities, submitted the manuscript of
his _Chinese Architecture_ to Dr. Johnson's perusal. Johnson was much
pleased with it, and said, 'It wants no addition nor correction, but a
few lines of introduction;' which he furnished, and Sir William
adopted[590].
He said to Sir William Scott, 'The age is running mad after innovation;
all the business of the world is to be done in a new way; men are to be
hanged in a new way; Tyburn itself is not safe from the fury of
innovation[591].' It having been argued that this was an
improvement,--'No, Sir, (said he, eagerly,) it is _not_ an improvement:
they object that the old method drew together a number of spectators.
Sir, executions are intended to draw spectators. If they do not draw
spectators they don't answer their purpose. The old method was most
satisfactory to all parties; the publick was gratified by a
procession[592]; the criminal was supported by it. Why is all this to
be swept away?' I perfectly agree with Dr. Johnson upon this head, and
am persuaded that executions now, the solemn procession being
discontinued, have not nearly the effect which they formerly had[593].
Magistrates both in London, and elsewhere, have, I am afraid, in this
had too much regard to their own ease[594].
Of Dr. Hurd, Bishop of Worcester, Johnson said to a friend, 'Hurd, Sir,
is one of a set of men who account for every thing systematically; for
instance, it has been a fashion to wear scarlet breeches; these men
would tell you, that according to causes and effects, no other wear
could at that time have been chosen.' He, however, said of him at
another time to the same gentleman, 'Hurd, Sir, is a man whose
acquaintance is a valuable acquisition.'
That learned and ingenious Prelate[595] it is well known published at
one period of his life _Moral and Political Dialogues_, with a woefully
whiggish cast. Afterwards, his Lordship having thought better, came to
see his errour, and republished the work with a more constitutional
spirit. Johnson, however, was unwilling to allow him full credit for his
political conversion. I remember when his Lordship declined the honour
of being Archbishop of Canterbury, Johnson said, 'I am glad he did not
go to Lambeth; for, after all, I fear he is a Whig in his heart.'
Johnson's attention to precision and clearness in expression was very
remarkable. He disapproved of parentheses; and I believe in all his
voluminous writings, not half a dozen of them will be found. He never
used the phrases _the former_ and _the latter_, having observed, that
they often occasioned obscurity; he therefore contrived to construct his
sentences so as not to have occasion for them, and would even rather
repeat the same words, in order to avoid them[596]. Nothing is more
common than to mistake surnames when we hear them carelessly uttered for
the first time. To prevent this, he used not only to pronounce them
slowly and distinctly, but to take the trouble of spelling them; a
practice which I have often followed; and which I wish were general.
Such was the heat and irritability of his blood, that not only did he
pare his nails to the quick; but scraped the joints of his fingers with
a pen-knife, till they seemed quite red and raw.
The heterogeneous composition of human nature was remarkably
exemplified in Johnson. His liberality in giving his money to persons in
distress was extraordinary. Yet there lurked about him a propensity to
paultry saving. One day I owned to him that 'I was occasionally troubled
with a fit of _narrowness_.' 'Why, Sir, (said he,) so am I. _But I do
not tell it_.' He has now and then borrowed a shilling of me; and when I
asked for it again, seemed to be rather out of humour. A droll little
circumstance once occurred: as if he meant to reprimand my minute
exactness as a creditor, he thus addressed me;--'Boswell, _lend_ me
sixpence--_not to be repaid_[597].'
This great man's attention to small things was very remarkable. As an
instance of it, he one day said to me, 'Sir, when you get silver in
change for a guinea, look carefully at it; you may find some curious
piece of coin.'
Though a stern _true-born Englishman_[598], and fully prejudiced against
all other nations, he had discernment enough to see, and candour enough
to censure, the cold reserve too common among Englishmen towards
strangers: 'Sir, (said he,) two men of any other nation who are shewn
into a room together, at a house where they are both visitors, will
immediately find some conversation. But two Englishmen will probably go
each to a different window, and remain in obstinate silence. Sir, we as
yet do not enough understand the common rights of humanity[599].'
Johnson was at a certain period of his life a good deal with the Earl of
Shelburne[600], now Marquis of Lansdown, as he doubtless could not but
have a due value for that nobleman's activity of mind, and uncommon
acquisitions of important knowledge, however much he might disapprove of
other parts of his Lordship's character, which were widely different
from his own.
Maurice Morgann, Esq., authour of the very ingenious _Essay on the
character of Falstaff_[601], being a particular friend of his Lordship,
had once an opportunity of entertaining Johnson for a day or two at
Wickham, when its Lord was absent, and by him I have been favoured with
two anecdotes.
One is not a little to the credit of Johnson's candour. Mr. Morgann and
he had a dispute pretty late at night, in which Johnson would not give
up, though he had the wrong side, and in short, both kept the field.
Next morning, when they met in the breakfasting-room, Dr. Johnson
accosted Mr. Morgann thus:--'Sir, I have been thinking on our dispute
last night--_You were in the right_[602].'
The other was as follows:--Johnson, for sport perhaps, or from the
spirit of contradiction, eagerly maintained that Derrick[603] had merit
as a writer. Mr. Morgann argued with him directly, in vain. At length he
had recourse to this device. 'Pray, Sir, (said he,) whether do you
reckon Derrick or Smart[604] the best poet?' Johnson at once felt
himself roused; and answered, 'Sir, there is no settling the point of
precedency between a louse and a flea.'
Once, when checking my boasting too frequently of myself in company, he
said to me, 'Boswell, you often vaunt so much, as to provoke ridicule.
You put me in mind of a man who was standing in the kitchen of an inn
with his back to the fire, and thus accosted the person next him, "Do
you know, Sir, who I am?" "No, Sir, (said the other,) I have not that
advantage." "Sir, (said he,) I am the _great_ TWALMLEY, who invented the
New Floodgate Iron[605]."' The Bishop of Killaloe, on my repeating the
story to him, defended Twalmley, by observing, that he was entitled to
the epithet of _great_; for Virgil in his groupe of worthies in the
Elysian fields--
_Hic manus ob patriam pugnando vulnera passi_, &c.
mentions
_Inventas aut qui vitam excoluere per artes_[606].
He was pleased to say to me one morning when we were left alone in his
study, 'Boswell, I think I am easier with you than with almost
any body.'
He would not allow Mr. David Hume any credit for his political
principles, though similar to his own; saying of him, 'Sir, he was a
Tory by chance[607].'