The Adventures of Ferdinand Count Fathom, Complete - Tobias Smollett
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While this affair was on the anvil, Renaldo, who could no longer withhold
the communication of his happiness from his sister and relations in
Germany, took up the pen, and, in a letter to his brother-in-law,
recounted all the circumstances of the surprising turn of fate which he
had experienced since his arrival in England. He likewise related the
story of Don Diego, informed them of the day appointed for his nuptials,
and entreated the Major to make a journey to London with his wife; or, if
that should be impracticable, to come as far as Brussels, where they
should be met by him and his Serafina. There was now but one day between
him and the accomplishment of his dearest wish, and that was spent in
procuring a licence, and adjusting the preparations for the grand
festival. Don Diego in the forenoon visited Madam Clement, to whom he
repeated his warm acknowledgments of her bounty and maternal affection to
his daughter, and presented to Serafina bank notes to the amount of five
hundred pounds, to defray the necessary expense for her wedding
ornaments.
All the previous steps being taken for the solemnisation of this
interesting event, and the hour of appointment arrived, the bridegroom,
accompanied by his father-in-law, hastened to the place of rendezvous,
which was the vestry-room of the church we have already described; where
they were received by the good clergyman in his canonicals; and here they
had not waited many minutes, when they were joined by Madam Clement and
the amiable bride, escorted by the friendly physician, who had all along
borne such a share in their concerns. Serafina was dressed in a sack of
white satin, and the ornaments of her head were adjusted in the Spanish
fashion, which gave a peculiar air to her appearance, and an additional
spirit to those attractions which engaged the heart of each beholder.
There was nothing remarkable in the habit of Renaldo, who had copied the
plainness and elegance of his mistress; but, when she entered the place,
his features were animated with a double proportion of vivacity, and
their eyes meeting, seemed to kindle a blaze which diffused warmth and
joy through the countenances of all present.
After a short pause, her father led her to the altar, and gave her away
to the transported Renaldo, before the priest who performed the ceremony,
and bestowed the nuptial benediction on this enraptured pair. The
sanction of the church being thus obtained, they withdrew into the
vestry, where Melvil sealed his title on her rosy lips, and presented his
wife to the company, who embraced her in their turns, with fervent wishes
for their mutual happiness.
Though the scene of this transaction was remote from any inhabited
neighbourhood, the church was surrounded by a crowd of people, who, with
uncommon demonstration of surprise and admiration, petitioned Heaven to
bless so fair a couple. Such indeed was their eagerness to see them,
that some lives were endangered by the pressure of the crowd, which
attended them with loud acclamations to the coach, after the bridegroom
had deposited in the hands of the minister one hundred pounds for the
benefit of the poor of that parish, and thrown several handfuls of
money among the multitude. Serafina re-embarked in Madam Clement's
convenience, with that good lady and Don Diego, while Renaldo, with
the clergyman and doctor, followed in Joshua's coach, to a pleasant
country-house upon the Thames, at a distance of a few miles from London.
This the Jew had borrowed from the owner for a few days, and there they
were received by that honest Hebrew, who had provided a very elegant
entertainment for the occasion. He had also bespoke a small but
excellent band of music, which regaled their ears while they sat at
dinner; and the afternoon being calm and serene, he prevailed on them to
take the air on the river, in a barge which he had prepared for the
purpose.
But, notwithstanding this diversity of amusement, Renaldo would have
found it the longest day he had ever passed, had not his imagination
been diverted by an incident which employed his attention during the
remaining part of the evening. They had drunk tea, and engaged in a
party at whist, when they were surprised with a noise of contention from
a public-house, that fronted the windows of the apartment in which they
sat. Alarmed at this uproar, they forsook their cards, and, throwing up
the casement, beheld a hearse surrounded by four men on horseback, who
had stopped the carriage, and violently pulled the driver from his seat.
This uncommon arrest had engaged the curiosity of the publican's family,
who stood at the door to observe the consequence, when all of a sudden
appeared a person in canonicals, well mounted, who, riding up to those
who maltreated the driver, bestowed upon one of them such a blow with the
butt-end of his whip, as laid him sprawling on the ground; and, springing
from his saddle upon the box, took the reins into his own hand, swearing
with great vehemence, that he would murder every man who should attempt
to obstruct the hearse.
The good priest who had married Renaldo was not a little scandalised at
this ferocious behaviour in a clergyman, and could not help saying aloud,
he was a disgrace to the cloth when the horseman looking up to the
window, replied, "Sir, may I be d--n'd, if any man in England has a
greater respect for the cloth than I have; but at present I am quite
distracted." So saying, he whipped up the horses, and had actually
disentangled the hearse from those who surrounded it, when he was opposed
by another troop, one of whom alighted with great expedition, and cut the
harness so as that he could not possibly proceed. Finding himself thus
driven to bay, he leaped upon the ground, and exercised his weapon with
such amazing strength and agility, that several of his antagonists were
left motionless on the field, before he was overpowered and disarmed by
dint of numbers, who assailed him on all sides.
The mad parson being thus taken prisoner, an elderly person, of a very
prepossessing appearance, went up to the hearse, and, unbolting the door,
a young lady sprung out, and shrieking, ran directly to the public-house,
to the infinite astonishment and affright of the whole family, who
believed it was the spirit of the deceased person, whose body lay in the
carriage. Renaldo, who was with difficulty restrained from interposing
in behalf of the clergyman against such odds, no sooner perceived this
apparition, than, supposing her to be some distressed damsel, his
Quixotism awoke, he descended in an instant, and rushed into the house,
among those that pursued the fair phantom. Don Diego and the physician
took the same road, while the real clergyman and Joshua tarried with the
ladies, who were, by this time, very much interested in the event.
Melvil found the young lady in the hands of the old gentleman, who had
released her from the hearse, and who now bitterly upbraided her for her
folly and disobedience; while she protested with great vivacity, that
whatever she might suffer from his severity, she would never submit to
the hateful match he had proposed, nor break the promise she had already
made to the gentleman who now attempted to rescue her from the tyranny of
a cruel father. This declaration was followed by a plentiful shower of
tears, which the father could not behold with unmoistened eyes, although
he reviled her with marks of uncommon displeasure; and turning to the
Count, "I appeal to you, sir," said he, "whether I have not reason to
curse the undutiful obstinacy of that pert baggage, and renounce her for
ever as an alien to my blood. She has, for some months, been solicited
in marriage by an honest citizen, a thirty thousand pound man; and
instead of listening to such an advantageous proposal, she hath bestowed
her heart upon a young fellow not worth a groat. Ah! you degenerate
hussy, this comes of your plays and romances. If thy mother were not a
woman of an unexceptionable life and conversation, I should verily
believe thou art no child of mine. Run away with a beggar! for shame!"
"I suppose," replied Renaldo, "the person to whom your daughter's
affection inclines, is that clergyman who exerted himself so manfully at
the door?" "Clergyman!" cried the other, "adad! he has more of the devil
than the church about him. A ruffian! he has, for aught I know, murdered
the worthy gentleman whom I intended for my son-in-law; and the rogue, if
I had not kept out of his way, would, I suppose, have served me with the
same sauce. Me! who have been his master for many years, and had
resolved to make a man of him. Sir, he was my own clerk, and this is the
return I have met with from the serpent which I cherished in my bosom."
Here he was interrupted by the arrival of the citizen for whom he had
expressed such concern; that gentleman had received a contusion upon one
eye, by which the sight was altogether obstructed, so that he concluded
he should never retrieve the use of that organ, and with great clamour
took all the spectators to witness the injury he had sustained; he
entered the room with manifest perturbation, demanded satisfaction of the
father, and peremptorily declared it should not be a lost eye to him if
there was law in England. This unseasonable demand, and the boisterous
manner in which it was made, did not at all suit the present humour of
the old gentleman, who told him peevishly he owed him no eye, and bade
him go and ask reparation of the person who had done him wrong.
The young lady snatching this favourable occasion, earnestly entreated
Melvil and his company to intercede with her father in behalf of her
lover, who, she assured them, was a young gentleman of a good family, and
uncommon merit; and in compliance with her request they invited him and
his daughter to the house in which they lodged, where they would be
disencumbered of the crowd which this dispute had gathered together, and
more at leisure to consult about the measures necessary to be taken. The
old gentleman thanked them for their courtesy, which he did not think
proper to refuse, and while he led, or rather hauled Mademoiselle over
the way, under the auspices of the Castilian, Renaldo set the lover at
liberty, made him a tender of his good offices, and advised him to wait
at the public-house for an happy issue of their negotiation.
The pseudo-parson was very much affected by this generous proffer, for
which he made suitable acknowledgments, and protested before God he would
die a thousand deaths rather than part with his dear Charlotte. Her
father no sooner entered the apartment, than he was known by Joshua to be
a considerable trader in the city of London, and the merchant was glad to
find himself among his acquaintance. He was so full of the story which
had brought him thither, that he had scarce sat down when he began to
complain of his hard fate, in having an only child who was so mean,
stubborn, and contumacious; and every sentence was concluded with an
apostrophe of reproaches to the delinquent.
The Jew having allowed him to ring out his alarm, condoled his
misfortune, and gravely counselled the young lady to wean her affections
from such an unworthy object, for he supposed her favourite was a man of
no principle, or liberal endowments, otherwise her father would not
exclaim so bitterly against her conduct. Charlotte, who wanted neither
beauty nor understanding, assured him that her lover's character was, in
all respects, unblemished, for the truth of which assertion she appealed
to her papa, who owned, with reluctance, that the young man was a
gentleman by birth, that he had served him with remarkable diligence and
integrity, and that his accomplishments were far superior to his station
in life. "But then," said he, "the fellow has not a shilling of his own,
and would you have me give away my daughter to a beggar?"
"God forbid!" cried the Jew, "I always understood you possessed an ample
fortune, and am sorry to find it otherwise." "Otherwise!" cried the
citizen, with some acrimony, "take care what you say, sir; a merchant's
credit is not to be tampered with." "I beg your pardon," answered the
Hebrew, "I concluded that your circumstances were bad, because you
objected to the poverty of the young man after you had owned he was
possessed of every other qualification to make your daughter happy; for
it is not to be imagined that you would thwart her inclinations, or seek
to render an only child miserable on account of an obstacle which you
yourself could easily remove. Let us suppose you can afford to give with
your daughter ten thousand pounds, which would enable this young man to
live with credit and reputation, and engage advantageously in trade, for
which you say he is well qualified, the alternative then will be, whether
you would rather see her in the arms of a deserving youth whom she loves,
enjoying all the comforts of life with a moderate fortune, which it will
always be in your own power to improve, or tied for life to a monied man
whom she detests, cursing her hard fate, and despising that superfluity
of wealth, in spite of which she finds herself so truly wretched."
The old gentleman seemed to be startled at this observation, which was
reinforced by Renaldo's saying, that he would, moreover, enjoy the
unutterable pleasure of giving happiness to a worthy man, whose gratitude
would co-operate with his love, in approving himself a dutiful son, as
well as an affectionate husband. He then represented the family
disquiets and dismal tragedies produced from such mercenary and
compulsive matches, and, in conclusion related the story of Don Diego and
his daughter, which when the merchant heard, he started up with marks of
terror in his countenance, and, throwing up the casement, called upon
Valentine with great vociferation. This was the name of his daughter's
admirer, who no sooner heard the summons than he flew to the spot from
whence it came, and the merchant, without any further preamble, seizing
his hand, joined it with that of Charlotte, saying, with great
trepidation, "Here, take her, in the name of God, and thank this
honourable company for your good fortune."
The lovers were transported with exquisite joy at this sudden
determination in their favour. Valentine, having kissed the hand of his
mistress with all the eagerness of rapture, and acknowledged the
merchant's generosity, paid his respects to the ladies with a very polite
address, and with demonstrations of uncommon gratitude and sensibility,
thanked the gentlemen, and the Count in particular, for their good
offices, to which he attributed the happiness he now enjoyed. While
Serafina and Madam Clement caressed the amiable Charlotte, the rest of
the company congratulated her admirer upon his choice and success, though
the clergyman could not help reprehending him for profaning the
sacerdotal habit.
Valentine heartily asked pardon for having given such cause of offence,
and hoped he should be forgiven, as it was a disguise which he thought
absolutely necessary for the execution of a scheme upon which his
happiness depended. He then, at the request of Renaldo, unfolded the
mystery of the hearse, by giving them to understand that Charlotte's
father having got inkling of their mutual passion, had dismissed his
clerk, and conveyed his daughter to a country-house in the neighbourhood
of London, in order to cut off their correspondence; notwithstanding
these precautions they had found means to communicate with each other by
letters, which were managed by a third person; and his rival being very
importunate in his solicitations, they had concerted the expedient of the
hearse, which he provided and conducted through a road contiguous to the
end of the merchant's garden, where Charlotte, being apprised of the
design, waited for its approach, and embarked in it without hesitation.
Valentine thought himself sufficiently screened from discovery by his
disguise, but he was unfortunately met by a servant of the family, who
recollected his features, and immediately gave the alarm, upon which the
father and his friends took horse, and pursued them by two different
roads, until they were overtaken at this place.
He had scarce finished this short relation, when his rival, bluntly
entering the apartment, with an handkerchief tied round his eye,
committed Valentine to the charge of a constable, who attended him, by a
warrant from a justice of the peace in that neighbourhood, and threatened
to prosecute the merchant on an action of damages for the loss of an eye,
which he said he had sustained in his service. The company endeavoured
to appease this citizen, by representing that his misfortune was no other
than a common inflammation, nor was it owing to malice aforethought, but
entirely to the precipitate passion of an incensed young man, who, by the
bye, acted in his own defence. At the same time the merchant promised to
make any reasonable satisfaction, upon which the other demanded an
obligation, importing that he would, in ten days from the date, bestow
upon him his daughter in marriage, with a portion of fifteen thousand
pounds, or, in case of failure, pay him double the sum.
The merchant, exasperated at this extravagant demand, told him flatly he
had already disposed of his daughter to Valentine, who, he believed, was
a much more deserving man, and that he was ready to wait upon the
magistrate who had granted the warrant, in order to give bail for his
future son-in-law. This was a mortifying declaration to the plaintiff,
though he condoled himself with the hope of being a gainer by the loss of
his eye, and now the pain was over would have been very sorry to find his
sight retrieved. The old gentleman, Joshua, and Renaldo accompanied the
prisoner to the house of the justice, where he was immediately admitted
to bail. Upon their return Valentine shifted his dress, and they supped
together with great cordiality and mirth, maintained at the expense of
the discarded lover.
After supper Don Diego walked a minuet with Madam Clement; for whom, by
this time, he had contracted an extraordinary degree of affection.
Valentine had the honour to dance with the incomparable Serafina, whose
beauty and attractions dazzled the eyes of the new-comers, and struck her
bashful partner with awe and confusion; and Melvil presented his hand to
the agreeable Charlotte, who performed so much to the satisfaction of her
father, that he could not help expressing his joy and pride. He praised
God for throwing him in the way of our company, and engaged the clergyman
to unite the young couple, after having appointed a day for the ceremony,
and invited all present to the wedding. The evening having been
insensibly consumed in these avocations, and the night pretty far
advanced, the ladies withdrew without ceremony; and the retreat of
Serafina filled Renaldo's breast with tumult and emotion; his blood began
to flow in impetuous tides, his heart to beat with redoubled vigour and
velocity, while his eyes seemed to flash with more than human splendour.
Now his imagination began to anticipate with the enthusiastic rage of an
inspired sibyl; he was instantaneously transported from the conversation,
and every nerve was braced to such a degree of impatience, that human
nature could not long endure the tension.
He, therefore, having withstood the impulse about a quarter of an hour,
at length gave way to his impetuosity, and, springing from his friends,
found himself in a dark passage, at the farther end of which he perceived
Madam Clement coming out of a chamber with a light, which, at sight of
him, she set down, and vanished in a moment. This was the star that
pointed to his paradise; he hailed the signal, entered the apartment,
and, like a lion, rushing on his prey, approached the nuptial bed, where
Serafina, surrounded by all the graces of beauty, softness, sentiment,
and truth, lay trembling as a victim at the altar, and strove to hide her
blushes from his view--the door was shut, the light extinguished--he
owned his lot was more than mortal man could claim.
Here let me draw the decent veil that ought to shade the secret mysteries
of Hymen. Away, unhallowed scoffers, who profane, with idle pleasantry
or immodest hint, these holy rites; and leave those happy lovers to
enjoy, in one another's arms, unutterable bliss, the well-earned palm of
virtue and of constancy, which had undergone the most severe refinement.
A more deserving pair night's curtain shrouds not in its dark extent.
The thoughts of Renaldo's felicity threw a damp on the spirits of
Valentine, who saw the term of his probation protracted a few days
longer, and could not help wishing in his heart that he had achieved the
adventure which would have abridged his expectation, though at the
expense of the old gentleman's displeasure. He filled a bumper to the
health of the bride and bridegroom, and throwing up his eyes with marks
of admiration, exclaimed, "How happy is the Count! alas! five days longer
must I rein my impatience!" "It is but reasonable, you rogue, that your
betters should have the start of you," said the merchant, who did him
justice in the glass, and counselled him to drown his impatience with
good claret. The youth followed his advice, and it was late before the
company retired to rest.
These citizens, however, resolved to seize an opportunity of rallying the
new-married couple, according to custom, and with that view arose early
in the morning, on the supposition of finding them still asleep; but they
were not a little surprised, when they entered the breakfasting room, to
see Renaldo, and his amiable bed-fellow, already dressed, and awaiting to
do the honours of the house. The old gentleman would fain have cracked a
joke upon their extraordinary despatch, but he was so much overawed by
the dignity and tamed by the sweetness of Serafina's carriage, that he
durst not give utterance to his conception; and Valentine stood silent
and abashed, as in the presence of a superior being. After breakfast
these gentlemen and Charlotte again expressed their sense of the
obligations they owed to this happy family, repeated their invitation,
and, taking leave, returned to London in a coach that was provided
overnight.
Our friends being thus left to themselves, Don Diego turned towards
Melvil: "Now," said he, "that I have yielded to the impatience of your
love, as well as to the eagerness of my own desire to make you happy, I
must beg leave to interrupt, for a little while, the stream of your
mutual pleasure, and propose a melancholy excursion, which, however, will
not be wholly void of enjoyment. I have too long delayed the performance
of my duty at Antonia's grave--let us spend the forenoon in that pious
pilgrimage--I will drop a few tears to the memory of that excellent
woman, and never afterwards shall my friends be troubled with my grief."
The proposal being universally approved, they set out for the place,
which had oft been visited by the gentle Serafina, who conducted her
father to a black marble stone, which Renaldo had ordered to be laid over
the grave; and, as he kneeled to kiss the monument, he perceived this
plain inscription in the Spanish tongue:--Antonia de Zelos primera en
todo lo que es ser bueno, y sin segundo en todo lo que fue ser
desdichado, quedad con Dios! that is, Antonia de Zelos, unmatched in
virtue, and unequalled in misfortune, adieu! "O faithful record!" cried
the Castilian, smiting his breast, while his tears distilled upon the
marble, "thy goodness was the gift of Heaven, but thy misfortunes were
derived from the guilt of Don Diego; yet his sorrow shall expiate his
offence, and his penitence find favour in the sight of Heaven! Rest,
rest, ill-fated virtue!--eternal peace shall guard thy tomb, and angels
minister to thy unspotted shade; nor shall thine ashes lie in dark
obscurity here will I raise a monument, more suited to thy excellence and
name." Serafina melted with filial tenderness; nor were the rest unmoved
at this affecting scene, which Don Diego did not quit without reluctance.
CHAPTER SIXTY-SEVEN
THE LONGEST AND THE LAST.
The nature of this visit had softened every heart, and saddened every
countenance; and they walked in solemn silence to the other side of the
church-yard, in order to regain their carriages; when, at the turning of
the stile, they saw a young woman, in wretched attire, running out of a
poor habitation, wringing her hands in all the agony of despair.
Notwithstanding the distraction in her countenance, and the meanness of
her apparel, she discovered a regularity of features, and a delicacy of
air, which did not at all correspond with the misery of her equipage.
These exhibitions of extreme distress soon attracted the notice and
compassion of our company, and Melvil's beauteous help-mate, accosting
this forlorn damsel with a pity-breathing aspect, asked the cause of her
disorder.